falconken02 asked: Dec 8th, I'm beginning to think that it's just not in the cards for me :( (Still no London Christmas pics)
I STILL think it is too early… but lets do it. Here comes Christmas….. Reblog to your heart’s content…
Anonymous asked: Speaking of snow, have you any done any work in the snow ?
SNOW! I am pretty tolerant as a model (mud, muck, goop, heat, slime) but SNOW - Ewwww…. lets see what I can find. : )
musingsofmike asked: Have you found that your inability to bear children has hindered your search for a boyfriend/partner/cuddler? I only ask, because I have no intentions of having children either, and it was difficult finding a significant other who was okay with that.
I don’t bring it up on a first date? IN the same way that I do not bring my modeling?
It would be something that I would bring up on a second or third date - There are just SO many guys that I go out with that I am not actually interested in or that *would never* understand my line of work - I want someone to hook/line/sink me… AND THEN….. Once that happens?
I have to have them overcome the hurdles of “Hey I get naked for a living” and “I am REALLY sorry but we can never have kids together” - Life gets really complicated as you get older. More and more baggage, you know?
inkspot999 asked: Glad you're home! :-)
Yeah. I am too. My *actual* mom came to visit me today. She was cute and happy and lovely - She left - Matt came home at 6pm - Wine and hookah and Matt trying to catch up on his finals for college tonight…. A sleepy kitten on the couch….. Momdog’s head on my lap… Fake Fireplace doing it’s thing - All is good in the world for tonight.
I am missing Family dinner tonight, though - I won’t see any of my other friends until next week. I fly out to Dallas on Friday morning-Monday night… I keep telling myself to leave the house. But I WANT to be home. I miss my dog and the comfort of Matthew….
Modeling demands so much of my Life…. I am not sure if you know what I am saying… but it is VERY demanding. I am going to miss everyone … And my dog… And my bed… and everything this month…. It makes me very very distant from reality sometimes.
Anonymous asked: I think kids are in your future. I just think when you are ready you should foster or adopt. You would be one of the coolest moms ever. I believe in you. You will continue to leave your mark on the world by influencing people around you.
I feel very comfortable fostering animals but I am not sure how I feel about being in charge of another’s human’s life… that is HUGE. I mean - HUGE! Like SOOOOOO FUCKING HUGE! I don’t know if my brain could handle it.
Maybe someday. But not anytime soon. I am still working on putting ME-back-together. I am like Humpty-dumpty…. I am a mess. I would feel guilty trying to raise kids in this kind of atmosphere….. I know it. I see it. I am working on it.
heavens-dark-little-angel asked: Chickens and foster animals... Matthew and momdog.... That's it. As long as are happy. That's all that matters. :)
EXACTLY! - I am very happy - Most of my life, I imagined myself as a 50 year old with two little girls on a farm… but I can handle what I have. I enjoy it. I am more than happy with what I have…. It just isn’t what I *expected* … you know?
illbegotdamn asked: i found out at 30 that i've had a tumor on my pituitary gland all my life & it's pretty much screwed up my hormones. can't have kids either now. it's rough.
I think that if you spent your entire life REALLY wanting kids… that could be horrifically difficult (I am so so sorry!….). But? For me? I never really imagined myself with kids - So I don’t struggle with my body’s choices - Humans always long for whatever they cannot have and kids are SO biologically built into our psyche…. So obviously, I grieve a bit about it… but it isn’t something that ruins my entire life…. I will just dedicate my life elsewhere, you know?
dontheold asked: I hope your drive home goes smoothly & is uneventful
Lets just say? I am scared of my car. I am not going to drive her for awhile….. The breaks? The engine light? The leak in the roof that makes the floor rot? The weird chug-chug thing at 50 miles per an hour? Hell no…..
My car is pretty much dead. I am dragging out some pretty morbid last moments with her (and I KNOW it)… But to get a car? Or to not get a car? To have a license? Or to not have a license? I just do not know. It is putting a hold on everything right now. I don’t want to buy a car… and then have it sit until next September… you know? I am really stuck.
backwoodsben asked: Are you going to offer a digital version to purchase of your calendar and/or upcoming book?
Corwin talked me into Zivity …. NOT YET! ……. But in late january - You will be able to purchase gorgeous photo sets from Zivity… : ) I will post about it once they are up… it’s going to be awhile….!
Anonymous asked: I admire you for a couple of years now. Some of your recent posts worried me. You said you can not have kids because your body is messed up. So sad to read that. What s wrong with your body?
I cannot have children. I am not sure if it was the Ovarian cancer that I had as a very young adult? Or if my body hates kids? I just don’t know - But I cannot have kids. I haven’t been on birth control in over four years now - Kids are just not in my future.
Just chickens and foster animals and Momdog and Matthew… hehehe…. that’s it.
Anonymous asked: Kyah is so beautiful! She looks almost exactly like my kitty! I wish I could adopt her right now!
OMG! SO happy to be home with this kitty again… She is SO much better adjusted since last week - Matt didn’t let her escape! She is grand! She is regal! She is perfect! I love her…..
I swear - I never do this - But I am going to keep her until January. I REALLY love her and want her to be 100% before she transfers to her new home… I am not going to push Christmas on her. She is super special.
marksfri asked: is there any way you can recover you twitter account? have you looked into it?
I AM WORKING ON IT! - It is really difficult. That Russian site? Changed my Email address … So it is HARD to prove that I owned the account. Hopefully it gets figured out. I don’t use it very often - But I don’t want people to click on things that give them viruses …